Tuesday, 30 June 2009

Good Morning

Good Morning
I haven't written anything for a few days so thought i better say hello.
its been a busy week since Marks wedding. I was recovering for several days afterwards. I left my blond wig at my parents house. Maybe my Dad will use it. I've been busy at working serving tapas I've started a fitness regime, Michael Jackson died and it was my birthday.
First of all may i take this opportunity to thank everyone for there birthday wish's. Sorry i didn't reply to any to you personally but i'm really shit at getting back to people.
And now at the old age of 27 i've decided to start exercising. it all started a couple of weeks ago. I was getting very stressed and frustrated with a project and just wanted to get out of the house to clear my head. so I did something I have never ever done before. put on my trainers and went for a run. a proper run, for no reason and contrary to popular belief I was not running to make last orders at the pub or because there was a sale on at macdonalds. to quote Forest Gump "I just felt like runnin" i didn't make it as far as he did but i did go from my flat down to ocean terminal, which is 2 miles away. im not sure how i ended up there as i thought i was headin in another direction but thats where destiny conspired to take me. once i realised where i was i was annoyed when it started to rain. i thought "fuck it thats enough for today. luckily i had a tenner in my pocket, so I bought a bottle of water and a bounty bar and caught the bus home.
I've been out for a run twice since then, and no i have not got the bus again. now you may mock me for getting the bus home, but in my defense, it was raining and that is the most exercise i've done since......... well ever. the fitness thing was also partly inspired by Marks wedding. I was of course wearing the kilt to mark the day, and it was a bit tight. My kilt was a 21st birthday present making it 6 years old and it was a bit tighter than I remember. I have another wedding in early september and I suspect I will be the only kilted man there so I have to be looking good. No one is gonna wanna shag a fat man in a kilt, but once I've lost a few pounds and the ladies see me on the dance floor they will be queueing up for a taste of the Andy love!
As well as the running I also splashed out on a wii fit. I know this is not the most exact thing in the world but its cheaper than going to the gym. I'm working my way through all the exercises although I think its schizophrenic. One minute its saying I am a couch potato and next its saying I'm a muscle legend. Its weird because I am struggling to do one proper push up.
so Michael jackson is dead. I found out via text, all it said was "incredible news. its the day music died" i thought he was talking about this
I immediately checked online to see if it was true and sadly it was. it was on the internet so it had to be true. twitter was filled with tweets bidding jacko farewell. I follow around 15o people on twitter and almost all of them were saying rip jacko or quoting lines from one of his songs or some bollocks. At the end of the day im sorry he's dead. its sad when anyone dies. but has everyone forgot he was a kiddie fiddler??? someone told me recently that you should not speak ill of the dead. but thats bollocks. If someone is a cunt and then dies, why should my opinion of that person change, they were still a cunt, just now they are a dead cunt, which doesn't bother me. Hitler is dead, should we show proper respect and not say bad things about him? should we not make fun of his charlie chaplin moustache and the fact he only had one testicle?
Now don't get me wrong, im not comparin jacko to hitler, im just saying remember the facts. He was the king of pop and rightly so. He was an awesome musician but he was also very very fucked up. he looked like a toy. he was a very very strange man. That being said i would have loved to of seen him live. I still dance badly to thriller whenever i hear it.

So my birthday came and went, im now another year older but i don't feel any wiser. I share my birthday with a couple of friends, Martin, Aders and Jeanine. I wonder if they feel any wiser today? i doubt it, Jeanine is probably hungover from drinking too many cocktails on fire island and Aders is already far wiser than any man i know, just in his own unique way. My birthday celebrations started on saturday night after work. After cashing up the staff sang happy birthday to me which came as a surprise as i thought they had all left. they got me a cheesecake and wrote "happy birthday G.L.M" in caramel sauce. (G.L.M. stands for Good Looking Manager, i didn't come up with it, honest) After a glass of vino i was well behaved and headed home( this is mainly because i was skint). had a productive day on the sunday i did my wii fit workout, my wii fit age has went down by 9 years in the space of a day, i feel like a time traveller. treated myself to a new pair of shoes and then realised i still hadn't sent my mum a birthday card. it was her birthday 3 weeks ago. I always find it difficult to buy presents for parents. I never know what they would like. I got them vouchers for my old work for christmas as it was quick and easy. there should be some kind of shop for parents. Just head in there and they have everything that your parent might possibly want. After at least 20 minutes of searching the shops i gave up and bought her some marks and spencers vouchers. I wrote a poem in her card to apoloise for the card being late tho

Happy birthday Mum, sorry its late
how was your day? im sure it was great!
here's your present, sorry it's shit
from your "other child," the one who's a git!

I trust she'll enjoy that. so back to my birthday. After a power nap, the drinking team( Adam Jon and myself) headed into our nations capital for cocktails and dancing. the first few bars we went to were a bit crap, we ended up in element on rose street, its quite a cool wee bar and bumped into a couple of people from work. There we drank lots. Adam disappeared at one point. We were deeply concerned, then my phone beeped and i saw this picture.

Mystery solved.

more drinks followed then we headed to espionage to rock out!
I quite like the second level of espionage (the indie rock level) they usually play decent tunes and the drink is not too expensive compared to some other edinburgh Bars. At this point it became obvious that adam was more drunk than Jon and I put together. A fact he proved by dancing like a nutter while i held the drinks. I think this is the first time this has ever happened.
I left the club just after half 2 as i was knackered, Adam stayed on to dance the night away. I was gutted that cafe picantes(the local kebab shop) was closed i went home and attempted to cook but then remembered i cant. I put a couple of pasties in the oven but forgot to set the timer, i woke up nearly 2 hours later and ate half of a very burnt chicken and mushroom pasty. it was minging!
so that was my birthday Im off on tuesday and i might go to the zoo, I've lived in edinburgh for 8 months now and i still haven't gone to the zoo. thats just wrong. I wonder how much it is to buy a monkey? So now im 27, that seems an odd age to be, i suppose now im technically in my late twenties. and in 2 months im goin back to college and probably be in a class filled with 17 and 18 year old little shits who think they are ace cos they aren't at school. O dear what have i let myself in for.
well thats all from me for now. thanks again for all the birthday wishes. hope all is cool with you wherever you happen to be in the world.
this blog was written whilst listening to the sounds of chameleon circuit, which is without a doubt the geekiest thing i have ever done, but the tunes are good. check them out at http://www.myspace.com/chameleoncircuitmusic

until next time
be cool

Andy G
p.s. if anyone actually does read the crap that i'm writing you can subscribe through this website.

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