Monday, 26 July 2010

The Anonymous Teuchter's Brother!

Hows it goin? 

A few days ago I received the following comment on the blog.

Anonymous Teuchter's Brither here; Yi could hiv blan me doon we a fethir the day, Saiterday 24th, Muther Tukhers (know on Dod Street as "that al hoor's shop") wiz open! So mi brither A.T wiz rang, shoddy work, nae tatties for him the nicht. Fit shiz deen is shut the sweetie shop (Caddyshack) or Crabbycack as us on Dod Street ca it and moved it intae Mutha Tukher's, in korparate parlance I think its ca'd doon sizin. So shi'll nae doot cairy on the mucky taktics on a the ither traders in the Dod Street area. The latist trick shi tried to pull wiz to try an get ither food shoppies in trubble wi the health by askin a jiner ti pit beasties in their letter boxis, cockroachis n the like!! He spragged her and the polis and the cooncil were telt. A thurilly nasty bitch. Bit shi's pittin her ither biziness at risk. Shi hires oot chuddy cleaning hoover things ti the cooncil ti clean chuddy aff the pavemint. So fella Ayebrrdonians ivery time yi spit yer chuddy on the pavemint yir pittin munny in her kype. 
Ats a fir noo. Stovie Dod (Pryvit Aye) 

A Translation

Anonymous Teuchters Brother here; You could have blown me down with a feather today, Saturday 24th, Mother Tuckerz (known on Dod Street as "that old whore's shop") was open! So my brother, Anonymous Teuchter, was wrong, poor quality work, no potatoes for him tonight. What she has done is shut down the sweet shop (Candyshack) or Crabbycack as us on Dod street call it, and moved it into Mother Tuckerz, in corporate parlance I think it is called down sizing. So she will no doubt carry on the mucky tactics on all the other traders in the Dod street area. The latest trick she tried to get away with was to try and get other food shops in trouble with the health authorities by asking a joiner to put insects in the letter box's, cockroaches and such like! He informed the police about this ladies nefarious activities and the council were also informed. A throughly unpleasant bitch. She is also putting her other business at risk. She hires out chewing gum cleaner hoover things to the council to clean chewing gum from the pavement. So fellow Aberdonians every time you spit your chewing gum on the pavement you are putting money in her pocket.
That's all for now
Stevie Dod (Private Eye)

Wow, a shocking report from Stevie Dod. Please be aware that none of these comments are mine. I have written none of this. Merely reproduced and translated it. For more of the Anonymous Teuchters comments CLICK HERE.

Thats All For Now 

Until Next Time 

Have A Nice 

Andy G 

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  1. You must think we are stupid, this techter shite is just another scam you made up to get at Mother Tucker and her hard working staff. You fat fairy fruity whiter. You should spend your time haveing ago at the other shitty shops in the area like Dublin Dave, Crustys, Baget Express etc and leave her alone. As for wowzie its pure rubbish.

  2. A hinnae laught as much since grunny caught her tit in the mungle. Far ti start? Me n ma brither Stovie Dod jist skelped each ither on the side o the heed tae mak sure and wir real a richt, I wint ti bide anon Teuchter bit yi kin dee a bit a sloothin in Kemnay an yi'll figer oot fa Stovie Dod is. Ask aroon the Burnett. Andy, Stovie disnae tranlate in Inglish tae Stevie, his feelins wis fair hurtit bit apairt fae at yir deein a fine job. I've been ca'd a whiter by my Granda and it means wanker or wonker in teuchter. I aye thocht Willie Wonka and his Chocklit factory was a bit o a dooble ontondray (ats Frinch by the way), bit I die gress. So I reckun the feel anon above is nae spring chucken. Efter readin aboot it here we wint ti Wowsie on Munday and how that feel above kin say its rubbish is beond beleaf, damn the bit it wis brill, best sweeties av ivver seen, blaws the al hoor's shop oot the water. Fir whit its wurth wiv hid sanny's fae Crustys and Dublin Dave an baith are fine tho the wifey in Crusy's is mair fun. Baguette Express is a bit samey.
    Yir filim wis a laf, wiv a seen tosspot custimers like at.



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