Friday, 19 November 2010

UN-Friendly Friday: Grappa The Crazy Killer Demon Dog From Hell

How's it goin?

As regular readers will know I have a semi regular feature on this blog called Friendly Friday. This is where I write a post all about someone who is lucky enough to be my friend, and it goes up on a friday. Hence the name.
I haven't written a friendly friday lately, mainly due to laziness. A lot of people still ask for one. But that's not how it works. If you ask you generally don't get. A Friendly Friday is an honour which is bestowed upon you, not something you ask for. Come on guys! You wouldn't ask the Queen for a knighthood would you?

Well today is Friday, but this Friendly Friday is with a slight twist as you may have gathered from the title. This is an UN friendly Friday and is all about Grappa The Crazy Killer Demon Dog From Hell.
Don't let this picture fool you! She is pure evil!

I recently moved house, I now live in CampaWorld with Althea & Ivano. And Grappa The Crazy Killer Demon Dog From Hell.
I have made a few videos featuring Grappa, which you can see at the various links below.

Now I think it is time for the origin of Grappa to be told.

Grappa is an agent of Satan!

Yes, you read that right, Satan, The Devil, Beelzebub. What ever you want to call him.  Satan the dark overlord is trapped in hell, he cannot escape due to him being trapped by Superman in a super strong cage made of super strong Kryptonian metal. He cannot leave hell to corrupt and destroy the planet, but he can send his minions to do so. 

Throughout the ages many of these minions have tried to destroy the human race through various means. Some of them you may have heard of Hitler, Stallan, Kriss Akabusi, and Mother Tuckers. 

Each of these "people" is actually the demon spawn of Satan himself, sent to earth on a mission of destruction. Fortunately most of these foe's have been defeated. Hitler was defeated by Captain America. Stallan was defeated by Lion-o from the Thundercats. Kriss Akabusi was defeated because he was just shit and clearly not as good as Roy Castle, and Mother Tuckers was defeated by one of the great unsung hero's of our time, Andy G! (Me)

Angered by the pathetic efforts of his previous minions, the dark overlord decided a different tactic was in order. In the very depths of hell, he took the soles of all the most truly evil people in the world, like people who play music through their phone speakers on the bus. All the previous contestants of Big Brother, and people who don't tip in restaurants. He took the soles from all these truly despicable people, as they are indeed the worst that humanity had to offer. He took those soles, and stuffed them into a dog. Then he sent that dog to the mortal plane on a mission to destroy the earth. 

That dog was Grappa.

Grappa was armed with several super powers in order to help her in her mission to destroy the world, so far only a few of these powers have been documented:

  • Super Psychic Mind Control Powers.
  • The ability to bark very loud and wake up Andy in the morning. 
  • The ability to do a massive crap at the furthest possible distance from a bin when ever Andy G takes her for a walk. 
  • The ability to grow wings enabling her to attack from above.

If you ever come across her in real life, don't look directly into her eyes.They are pure evil, that's how she will hypnotise you into loving her. The next thing you know you're an unwilling soldier for the forces of darkness!

She arrived on earth and made her way to the local dog shelter, using her insidious mind control powers to prevent her from being put down for being the crazy beast that she is. If only the man who put dogs down was blind, then the world would be a much safer place. She used her mind control powers to hypnotise hapless couple Althea & Ivano Campagnoli.
Look into the eyes of the dog in this picture, look how they glow. This is Grappa captured on camera using her Super Psychic Mind Powers!

Definitive Proof!

Grappa uses her insidious mind control powers on all that she meets. Unfortunately for her, the day she first met Andy G (Me), I was very, very hungover. The fact that my brain was swimming in a sea of booze protected me from her powers, and I have become immune. It is only Andy G that can see her for what she truly is, and it is only Andy G that can save us all. And now the never ending battle continues,

If you can't see the video's above then stop reading this crap on facebook and CLICK HERE

That's All For Now

Until Next Time

Have A Nice

Andy G

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