Wednesday, 29 December 2010

Star Wars: The Italian Menace


How's it goin?
So Ivano has now watched,

Now it's time to move onto the vastly inferior prequel trilogy.

I decided to educate Ivano in Star Wars by exposing him to the films in the order they were released as opposed to the way they are numbered. I believe this is the best way to experience Star Wars. I see the prequel Trilogy as just that, a prequel, not the first part of a series. The beauty of the prequel trilogy is you know where it's going, you always know that Annakin is going to become Darth Vadar.

If you watch the original trilogy first you get to see one of the biggest twists in movie history, that Darth Vadar is Lukes father. That's a shock and it's one worth experiencing. If you watch the films in order they were numbered, it obviously ruins the empire strikes back. Well not ruins it, but spoils it a little.

Anyway here we go with The Phantom Menace.

As per usual here is a short intro video from Ivano about his expectations.
If you can't see the video above then stop reading this crap on facebook and CLICK HERE.

So the film starts, and the text appears on the screen just as it does every other film, the first thing Ivano says is,

"What does it mean?"
"What does what mean?" I reply.
"Menace? Like a threesome?" He asks.
"What?" I ask him.
"You know, ménace a trois."
"No. That's ménage."

He then started reading beyond the title, 

"What's turmoil? Is it an oil company?"

Later on in the film he seemed very confused about Ewan Macgregor playing the young Obi Wan Kenobi, claiming that he looked like sting.

During the light saber battle with Obi Wan and Qui Gonn against Darth Maul, he appeared to be on the side of Darth Maul as he kept shouting,
"That's not fair, it's two against one! That's not fair!"

And when Darth Maul gets the better of Qui Gonn and stabs him with his light saber, it's quite an emotional moment in the film. Qui Gonn with his dying breath asks Obi Wan to train young Annakin to become a Jedi. All Ivano did was shout at the screen,

"The boy is a tosser!!"

Near the end of the film Ivano also suffered from some confusion regarding the various actors, just as he did with the original trilogy.

"Who's that black guy?" He asked.
"Samuel L Jackson." I told him.
"No. Are you sure? Is it not something Freeman?" 
"Do you mean Morgan Freeman?" I enquired.
"Yes, Morgan Freeman." He seemed quite chuffed with himself.
"No, it's Samuel L Jackson, trust me. It is NOT Morgan Freeman."
"Are you sure?"

So the film ended and as per usual I made this short video to document his reaction. In this video he accuses someone of being a pedophile, and once again confuses Samuel L Jackson with Morgan Freeman.
If you can't see the video above then stop reading this crap on facebook and CLICK HERE.

Come back next week where Ivano watches Episode II Attack of the Clones.

Same Jedi Time.

Same Jedi Channel.

That's All For Now

Until Next Time

May The Force Be With You

Andy G

If you want to get all the crap I write delivered straight to your inbox then go to and put your email address in the wee box that says "subscribe."
If you do subscribe then the force will be with you, always.

No comments:

Post a Comment


Related Posts with Thumbnails