Thursday, 23 July 2009

My face is itchy!

Hey how’s it going?
 Good to see u, well I cant really see you (or can I?)
Thought I’d write and give a quick update on the Life of Andy G.
I’ve been working away serving tapas and trying to maintain my new fitness regime. Sadly its not that easy, the weather has been a bit shit lately so its not been possible to go for a run. I use the wii fit whenever I can but I share the tv with the other guys in the flat so I can’t always use it. I am improving tho. Look what it said!!

Although I am fairly certain this thing is schizophrenic as less than 5 minutes later it called me a couch potato!

It may have said that as I did spend those 5 minutes shouting abuse at the woman on the screen. (I call her Wendy). She may be a bunch of pixels but she is a real bitch sometimes. She keeps saying “your legs shaking a bit”
Well Wendy that’s cos im only standing on one leg isn’t it???? Im not a statue ya know!
We fight a lot, but I think she’s starting to like me.
I have lost weigh since I started and I hope to lose a stone by the time I go to Paul & Sonya's wedding in September.

I scream and shout at my wii fit
Its not wendy’s fault, its me, im shit.
I really don’t like to exercise
But that’s no secret, to all you guys.
Hopefully I'll be slim, for the wedding in September
And give some lucky bridesmaid, a night to remember!

Im also busy preparing for my move to Aberdeen and adjustment to student life. It will be strange not having a proper income and having to get up really early in the morning! I’m heading up to Aberdeen this weekend to check out my new flat, have a meeting with my old boss about my triumphant (part time) return to my old restaurant, and to attend Althea's leaving do. She was my supervisor when I was manager, once she realized how crap it was to work with me in a managerial capacity she escaped and moved onto become the manageress of a great little place in the city centre. When I left the restaurant she quickly moved back to take my old job. (She was much better at it than me) She now has handed in her notice to move onto bigger and better things, coincidentally she resigned the same day I announced I was coming back! I must be really, really shit to work with!
Althea leaves and I come back
Will I have, to pick up the slack?
She doesn’t want to work with me
Or so it seems?
She’s leaving the restaurant, to follow her dreams.
I’ll think she’ll sit at home & drink too much wine
She’ll miss the Door, & be back in no time.
I’m trying to get into a student mindset already, I’m trying to save money anywhere I can, (hence the hair cut)

This haircut means no expensive hairgel and less shampoo used. I’ve also decided to grow a beard. This will save money on expensive shaving foam and razor blades. I figure if I’m going to be a student I should look the part so I’ve grown a crappy student beard.

I did a bit if research on beards for something to write about in the blog, I found this on wikipedia
In the course of history, men with facial hair have been ascribed various attributes such as wisdom and knowledge, sexual virility, masculinity, or high social status;
I thought that adequately described me, but then the sentence continued...........

and, conversely, filthiness, crudeness, or an eccentric disposition, such as in the case of a bum, hobo or vagrant.
This could also be an accurate description, anyone who has seen me when i have just woken up after a night of heavy drinking would agree.
Upon further research I discovered this. Also on wikipedia so it must be true!!
A recent study in the U.K. found that women rated men with facial stubble as tough, mature, aggressive, dominant and masculine - and as the best romantic partners, either for a fling or a long-term relationship
Well that is most definitely me, ladies from an orderly queue!
Many great people throughout history had beards, Abraham Lincoln, Ernest Hemingway, Vincent Van Gogh, Commander William Riker. All these guys looked cool with beards so I thought I’d give it a go.
Beards have been popular throughout history The Ancient Greeks regarded the beard as a badge or sign of virility which it was a disgrace to be without, but by the time of Alexander the Great the custom of smooth shaving was introduced. Reportedly, Alexander ordered his soldiers to be clean shaven, fearing that their beards would serve as handles for their enemies to grab and to hold the soldier as he was killed.
Well I'm not planning any great battles in the near future but ill make sure I grab a Gillette Mach 3 turbo before hitting the battlefield if anything comes up!
Now my beard is still in the shitty stubbly early phase, but I’ve got 2 years to train for the World Beard Championships, they will be held in Trondheim, Norway, May 17 2011. By that time I hope to look like this guy

And he only came in third
It’s been one week, since I had a shave
I look like a hooligan, but I know how to behave.
According to wikipedia, it’ll be a hit with the ladies
Come on girls, lets start making babies.
Well not really make them
I just want a shag
Ill be extra careful, ill even double bag!
I hope this Blog has educated you in some small way. I hope all is well with you wherever you happened to be in the world. and until next time......
Have a nice

I took several pics of myself but they all looked shit so I decided to replicate the "same vacant open mouthed expression" I used when I showed you all my new haircut, except this time I would wear my cowboy hat!

Andy G
this way you can get all the crap I type delivered straight to your inbox.

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