Saturday, 18 July 2009

The Name Game

Good evening!

How the hell r ya? Had a busy week? My week has been quite dull. Serving tapas to the masses in our nations capital is not as exciting as you may think. I have been stuck on the door for most of the week, which means I need to organise where people are sitting, sadly its not that busy so its quite an easy job. I have to stay by the door, so the phone gets answered and there is always someone there to greet the customers. The other day I had another potential love interest. A good looking blonde came in for lunch on her own, she felt a bit self conscious about being on her own, and didn’t want to sit in the main restaurant so she sat in the deli area. Although I don’t know how this made her feel less self conscious as every customer who came thru the front door would now see her, but who knows how a woman’s mind works? I don’t think they know themselves! Anyway after taking her order we got talking, she is moving up to Edinburgh in a week and she’s just here job hunting and trying to get to know the city. She had never been to Edinburgh before so I suggested a few decent pubs in town and a couple of decent restaurants I’ve been to. We were having quite a decent chat and in my head we were already madly in love. I then asked her what she was doing for accommodation; she said she was staying with her boyfriend.

Conversation over. There’s your bill! Have a good day!

Easy come easy go.

It can get slightly boring working the door, but you do get some entertainment from some of the truly stupid people who come through the door. Quite often people will just come in and say

“I have a booking”

And offer up no other information. They will just stare at me and expect me to know who they are. I’m not a Fucken mind reader!!! Good for you if you have a booking, so do all these other people on the page you fucken MONG! Sadly it is frowned upon when you talk to customers in this manner.

Customers are a strange bunch of people; I took a booking on the phone yesterday. When taking bookings I always take the first and last name. This is done because sometimes you get 2 bookings with the same surname and chaos ensues. And it happens more often than you would think, even if you have an unusual last name, I once had two booking under the name Dobbenmyre on the same night, turns out they were cousins who hadn’t seen each other in 20 years, I got the impression they would like to leave it that way. Also sometimes people coming may not know the surname of who booked. When I asked a customer for her first name, she said “now your pushing it!”

Now I’m pushing it? I’m asking for your first name! that’s all. It’s not like I’m breathing heavily down the phone asking what you’re wearing! Bloody people!

Today was not a particularly busy Friday. It did not help when it started to rain. I never understand people’s reaction to the rain. People seem terrified. People run through it to get somewhere, how much dryer do you think your actually gonna be if you run? Not much! People refuse to leave shops or bars because it’s raining. Its JUST WATER!!!!! What’s the worst that can happen? Do you think your gonna fucken drown!!

Sorry I am starting to sound like a miserable old git aren’t I? Maybe it’s my new haircut? Maybe it’s making me evil! That’s enough about work. I have been reading a great book at the moment its called Waiter Rant; it’s all about the life of a Real waiter in New York. It’s really good and completely accurate. Anyone reading this who works in hospitality you really should read it. You will totally relate to everything this guy says! Read his blog at or buy his book on Amazon. It’s really good. I sound like a shit advert don’t I?

Anyway what else has been happening? I’m heading up to Aberdeen within the next couple of weeks to check out a potential new flat, I need to be out of here in one month. So I want to get all my stuff up to Aberdeen within the next 3 weeks. Anyone in the Deen who happens to be reading this, please help me move house! Any help will be rewarded with beer and take away pizza!

Can anyone think of a better name for this blog? Right now its called The Blog of Andy G, im tryin to come up with something better, I have a few names in mind, mostly puns based on film titles.

Right lets have a competition. I’m after a name for this Blog. It should be witty, original, inspirational, unique, charming, mysterious, awesome, interesting and inoffensive, just like me.

If someone submits a name which I deem Awesome enough to use as the new title, I will travel to wherever they are in the world and buy them a pint of there favourite beverage, they will receive an entire blog entry dedicated to them and I will even write one of my (admittedly crappy) poems about them.

For a new title I’m looking to you!

Can you come up with a name, or even 2?

Let your creativity blossom

I need a title that’s truly awesome

If your titles are better than mine

Maybe you could feature in my next rhyme!

Please submit your names to

Good Night and Good Luck!

Andy G

p.s. for some reason face book have deleted all the Pics from my previous Blog entries, I don’t know why. I have sent them a semi abusive email asking what they think they are playing at! Hopefully the problem shall be rectified shortly.


I’ve just re read that blog entry and realised it’s a bit shit!! Especially that poem.

Ummmmmm sorry about that, to be honest I’m just a bit bored. But you must be bored too, what other excuse do you have for reading all the shit I write? Unless this is my future therapist trying to figure out what finally drove me over the edge before I got committed? That’s quite a worrying thought.

Ne way im gonna go now, if you can think of a decent name for this blog please let me know

Have a nice

Andy G

No comments:

Post a Comment


Related Posts with Thumbnails