Wednesday, 23 March 2011

More Conversations From The Club


How's it goin? 

It's been a busy few weeks in the life of Andy G. Lots of school work to be done and movies to be made. But I have to pay the bills somehow. So I'm still working in The Club when I can.

A few weeks ago we had a big name DJ in. I say big name DJ, I'd never heard of him, but apparently he was kind of a big deal. The place was packed. 800 people were in. It was the busiest night I'd seen in a very long time. It was a ticket only event and the tickets had sold out a couple of weeks earlier. All day the phones had been going with people asking for tickets. It was tres annoying. (That's french for very annoying.) About an hour before we opened I was busy setting up the bar, when the doorbell rang. I assumed it was staff so went to check, otherwise I would have ignored it. It wasn't staff, it was a woman trying to get in.

Andy: Hi, can I help?

Woman: Yeah, I'm here for the show.

Andy: Alright, we don't actually open until 9. It's only 8 o'clock.

Woman: The ticket says 8.

Andy: No it doesn't.

Woman: Yes it does.

The woman then gets out her ticket, checks it, and has a look of stupidity on her face.

Woman: Oh, never mind then.

Andy: No problem.

Woman: I have a spare ticket, do you want it?

Andy: What?

Woman: Do you want to buy my ticket?

Andy: No, I work here.

Woman: Yeah, but do you want a ticket for the show tonight?

Andy: No, I work here, I am working here tonight. Why would I want to pay for a ticket when I am working here.

Woman: Oh yeah. Do you have any friends?

Andy: Yes, lots.

Woman: Do any of them want a ticket.

Andy: I doubt it.

Woman: Are you sure?

Andy: Yes, if my friends wanted a ticket they could have got one from me, that's just one of the many advantages of having me as a friend.

Woman: I see. So you don't want a ticket?

Andy: No.

I then slammed the door in her face.

Why would I want a ticket to the show I am working?
Stupid fooking cow.

As I said this night was particularly busy, and the problem with that, is that at the end of the night, 800 people try to get their coats from the very small cloakroom all at the same time.
It's mental.
The queue is a dangerous place to be.
At one point Vinnie (my boss) grabbed me and he and I attempted to police the queue. However I don't wear a suit to work, and I don't have a name badge. So to the general public, we look like a couple of idiots just messing about with the queue for fun. I did try to explain this to the people I was trying to hold back, but they all demanded proof to see that I was the manager. Several people asked to see my badge, and they refused to believe that a manager would not wear a badge. Eventually I convinced my boss that the doormen should be doing this, while we observed from a safe distance.

One particularly drunken twat decided to try and cause a riot by screaming abuse.

"Come on guys, lets just shout abuse until they give us our fucken jackets." He screamed.

He then continued to shout a lot of abuse in the general direction of the cloakroom. I politely asked him to stop shouting and to join the queue or he would be removed from the building.

"Who the fuck are you like? You fucken prick!"

"I'm the manager, he's the doorman, and you're the drunken twat who's getting chucked out. Cya later dickhead."

I'm not gonna lie, that felt good.

It got to around 3:30 am and the cloakroom queue was still pretty long, but moving fairly quickly. One woman attempted to complain me. She said that this queue was a disgrace and that she was working at 8am the next day. I informed her that the cloakroom had been open all night and she didn't have to wait until the end of the evening to get her coat. And if she was working at 8am, she really shouldn't have been out so late in the first place.
A woman standing behind her then added in,
"Yeah you stupid bitch!"
The moaning woman shut up and waited her turn, while the woman who called her a bitch got jumped to the front of the queue.
I live by a simple rule in hospitality, if you're good to me, I'm good to you. If you're a knob, you'll get fook all from me.

We do a student night once a week, and its pretty busy, although it's not to everyones taste. One girl went storming out the door saying,
"I'm not gonna lie to ya, thats the shittest club in Aberdeen."
I asked her if she'd ever been to The Priory.
Also that night, a drunken woman saw me come down the stairs and said,

Drunk woman: Is there another floor?

Andy: Yes.
I then pointed to the stairs.

Drunk woman: Is it upstairs?

Andy: Yes, that's why I am pointing at the stairs.

Drunk woman: And it's open now?

Andy: Yes, that's why I just managed to come down those stairs and I am now directing you to them, and all these other people are walking up them. See?

Drunk woman: So, I'm allowed upstairs?

Andy: Yes of course.

She seemed over joyed at this, so much so that she screamed with delight, gave me a hug and ran off to find her pals who then all went upstairs giggling. I'm not entirely sure why. Upstairs is open every week, and it's not much better up there than it is done stairs. I suspect she may have thought it was the VIP area or something. She would be in for a massive disappointment

Half an hour later she had to be carried out by her mates cos she was too drunk to stand. Fookin students!

At the end of a long night in The Club, myself and the staff quite often have a well earned beer. And sometimes a snack. Here's a video of one of the barman enjoying an afterwork beverage and a nibble.

If you can't see the video above then stop reading this crap on facebook and CLICK HERE

That's All For Now

Until Next Time 

Have A Nice 

Andy G 

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