Friday, 18 February 2011

The Tale of the Bratislavan Stag Do: Naked Mud Wrestling, A Stolen Wallet, and A Drink In My Retina!


How's it goin?

Regular readers will know I went to four weddings this past summer, I've not blogged about my wedding experiences. I did write a draft of a post about one of them, and it was massive. Far too long. So I have decided to compile my experiences into a new book. At the moment it's called The Wedding Blogger, but if you can think of a better title then let me know. It's ages away from being finished as I am incredibly busy with school work, I'll get round to it eventually. Hopefully. I was doing some work on it last week and this got me thinking about other weddings and stag do's I went on.

Back in 2006, my mate Jonesy got married. And everyone knows that before you get married, you have to have a stag do. Or a hen night if you're a girl. But I never get invited to those. I was looking through some of my old photo's and found some photo's from Jonesy's Stag Do. Which I will share with you now.

The stag location was Bratislava, in Slovakia. Jonesy had been there before and had a great time. Plus it was really cheap. Although when we first arrived I got ripped off by a taxi driver, as I paid four times what I should have. Bastards.

What followed was drinking, lots and lots of drinking. And it was cheap drinking too. Which compelled us to drink more. At one point I got a drink thrown in my eye, which led me to scream the very popular phrase,

"Ow, there's a drink in my retina!"

My vision was obviously severely affected. Later that night when I attempted to get out of bed and go to the vending machine to buy some water, I tripped and bashed my head off the radiator nearly splitting my head open.

It hurt. A lot. And apparently we already had three bottles of water in the room.

I think it was a good look for me tho, I'm told chic's dig scars.

On the second night, we dressed Jonesy up as Daffyd from Little Britain.
I think it was a good look for him.

After drinking, and drinking lots, we were informed that our transport had arrived. Rod (the organiser) had something special planned for us. Although he refused to tell us what it was. We all piled into a minibus and off we went. We were driven far, far away. Into what looked like an industrial estate. Most of us were convinced that we were about to be killed and our bodies harvested for our organs. Then we saw, the pub.
Nothing special about this pub, it was just an ordinary pub in the middle of an industrial estate in Bratislava.
EXCEPT, this pub in the middle of an industrial estate in Bratislava was to be the venue for the greatest entertainment I have ever seen.

Naked women, naked women wrestling in mud.
It was awesome!

Jonesy was dragged into the pit and encouraged to take part.
Lucky bastard.

He seem's rather proud of himself in this picture. The first thing he said when he emerged, naked from the pit was:

"It's very cold mud!"

Other highlights from the weekend included:

Dr Kev and Mark perform an experiment with Coke and Mentos.

We bought some wooden weaponry.

And Rod fell asleep in a bar.

There was of course one other highlight from the weekend. Something which shall forever live in infamy. I recently downloaded an app that allows me to turn photo's into comic books. I think it's best to tell you the story like that.
Just keep a close eye on the girls hands.
Now I will admit to being a bit bored the other night, so I turned all the pictures from this incident into a comic book. And then I turned those pictures into a video comic. And then I added opening and closing credits to the video comic.
Like I said I was a bit bored.

If you can't see the video above then stop reading this crap on facebook and CLICK HERE
That's All For Now

Until Next Time

Have A Nice

Andy G

If you want to get all the crap I write delivered straight to your inbox then go to and put your email address in the wee box that says "subscribe."
If you do subscribe then one day I will take you to Bratislava and show you naked women wrestling in mud. It's Awesome!


  1. Hi,

    I'm going to Bratislava next week for a stag party.
    Can ou tell me the name of the bar for the naked mud wrestling.



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